Are you in the race for the most spoiled and indulged? The true brat of all spoiled brats? In this obvious satirical article, I thought it might be helpful to provide some coaching for those parents who are in the race for the most spoiled and entitled child on the block.
During the school year, there are practical limits to how much one can pamper a child. However, the summer opens the door to new levels of indulgence. By the end of the summer, we would set some high goals. For example, you must raise first graders who expect to play while others read, 2nd graders who show up 90” late each day while carrying a supersized iced coffee to class and by 5th grade, a true superstar brat will demand to carry their cell phones to class and text their mom about how mean the teachers are being.
Three Key Lessons to Raise the Most Entitled, Spoiled Child
Here are my top three mistakes, oh… I mean lessons… that will help your child to master the art of entitlement.
Lesson #1: Allow your child to know more than you do about parenting.
The truly spoiled are raised in a home where the child is viewed as the ultimate authority. Lessons you may have learned from your parents, books you may have read, advice from psychologists, as well as your “common sense” must be thrown out the window when faced with a child who is objecting to your wisdom, your consequences, or your limit setting.
Remember: Assume they know more. When it comes to what’s healthy, of course…they should choose fast food. When it comes to mature video games, like Call of Duty, of course they should own it. When it comes to bedtime, unquestionably your kids know better what is good for them.
This is a great start…but really, it’s only the beginning…
Lesson #2: Work harder at your children’s happiness; work harder at your children’s success and work harder at your children’s lives than they do.
This lesson is one of those “insider secrets” that must be considered carefully when in the race for the GOLD. If your child is given homework, made sure that you prod, push, negotiate… and ultimately work harder at solving their homework problems than they do. For any serious projects, you must stay up late while they go to bed. If your child is unhappy, negative, and asking you to ‘fix-it’ so they can be happy, then you must go ahead and fix-it. Do this repeatedly!
Work harder at solving their problems. Work harder at everything in their life.
Brat building lesson #3: Never set limits, and teach them that reality will always conform to their whining, demanding and complaining.
This is really an ultimate brat building secret…a true foundation of the spoiled and entitled. In the real world, effort is related to results. This is reality.
However, the truly entitled child must be protected from these rules of reality. If exposed, they might begin to realize that effort is required, and that consequences come with choices. At all costs, if we want a child who is fully indoctrinated in the ways of entitlement, we must give them what they want when they whine or complain. Please, never insist on real effort or contribution!
The best of the entitled are raised to presume that the limits that apply to others do not apply to them. They shouldn’t have to follow the rules, and if they break the rules, mom and dad MUST rescue them from the consequences.
They shouldn’t have to work when something is difficult. They should have no chores. They should get paid for taking their plate to the dishwasher or picking up their room. And when disrespectful, just surrender and given them what they want.
Those are my three key lessons to raising the spoiled and super indulged. However, if brat building does not appeal to you, then simply do the opposite! And smile…as you do so!